We are in our new house. All of our stuff is here, but I can't honestly say that we're "moved in." I'm not drowning in nearly as many boxes as I was three days ago, but I still feel overwhelmed by the unpacked boxes, the collapsed boxes, the uncollapsed boxes, and the half-unpacked boxes. I'm seriously lacking in motivation, and I think I can diagnose the source.
Homesickness. Yes, I'm homesick. I literally have knots in my stomach and tears trying to escape.
A few different people have told me that it took them a year to finally feel like their house that they had bought was home. The problem for me is that I'm a home-body. I love to be "home." A year seems like an eternity to wait. I want it to smell like my home, look like my home, and feel like my home now.
Don't give me the advice that putting my stuff out and around will make it feel like my own because so far it's not working. The places around here so far that I haven't had a problem in feeling comfortable in are at my computer desk and asleep in my bed. I know I just need time, but still, I wish I had stores of money so I could paint and redo things to make the different places around the house feel and SMELL like mine and not someone else's. We've been fixing up and cleaning up from the day we got the key and changed the locks.
This evening I told Matt that I want to be home, and he told me that this is home. I think I'd rather go visit my mom. She's always "home."
Our last move was a 1/4 mile away. For the first month I would drive past our old house and think about how strange it was that we didn't live there anymore. It felt like we should be able to still walk in there. Then someone new moved into our old place and now I don't really care too much about it.
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, I am so glad to hear that you changed the locks!!! You don't need any chances of Mr. Wierdo Underpants showing up in your livingroom.
ReplyDeleteSecond, while it took a year with our home in Orem, it didn't take as long this time around. And, it's okay if you need to cry. You, Matt and Jackson made memories in your last place. A little piece of you will always be there. I still feel weird when I drive past my old house. In fact we still refer to the new owners as "The Others" (did you see that movie? creepy!). I still want to peek in the windows and it's been 2 1/2 years!
I understand. What makes a home is memories and laughter, all all you've experienced thus far is cardboard and cleaning.
ReplyDeleteI look forward to creating memories and laughter there soon.
I guess we've always moved too much for me to feel as attached to a place. Part of me always held back.
ReplyDeleteBut maybe you guys need to do something fun in the new house? Make some memories! Or at least make some cookies. That's supposed to make a place feel/smell like "home".
Other idea: paint ONE room (for now). Maybe you need to show that house who's boss.
I feel your pain. I honestly think it does take me about a year to feel at home too. My only advice is to just keep pushing along. It will come.
ReplyDeleteHang in there LeMira! The good news is...you bought a house so you don't HAVE to move again! Each time you do something to your home, it will become a little more like "home."
ReplyDeleteI think that you need to have a party. No one cares if you aren't unpacked/painted/ready. Just call your buddies and have a potluck--you'll have fun! Also, have people take pics of your family in your new home, and in front of it. I you keep looking at the pics with the happy memories of a fun get together, maybe you'll be able to have some transference!
Now is the time to have your mom come and visit YOU! Lisa's advice sounds great!! Paint something in the living room or kitchen, where you spend the most time, even if it is just the window ledges and around the window frame.
ReplyDeleteHave the party Natalie suggests - it will make a lot of difference once your friends and relatives crowd in to your house, laughing and talking, eating the cookies you have made. Sugar cookie houses! Yes! Fun with Jackson and Matt coming up!
Love you all, Grandma Ruth
Everyone has such great advice. Not that I'm happy that you're homesick but seeing how you're feeling is helping me cope with my own "houselessness". So thanks! I hope things get better for you soon...I'm sure I'll be joining in your sentiments before the year is through. I'm glad to read all the advice everyone has.
ReplyDeleteA year? No way, it's never taken me that long! Less than a month. Your own smell will soon permeate your house and you'll for sure feel at home!
ReplyDeleteHaving moved 3 months ago, I know exactly what you mean. We even changed states and I'm still trying to become familiar with my surroundings and the way life moves here. It doesn't feel like home yet. Hopefully for both of us, it won't take the presumed year.
ReplyDeleteJustin once told me that "Home is where ever "you" are". I thought it was sweet at the time but I've really learned that over time. You can be under any roof, surrounded by any four walls and if you are not with the people you love it doesn't matter. So keep the ones you love close by and you'll be at home. I agree with others, Let yourself Cry and then get up and make some great memories. We'll be thinking of you!
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