Meekness

In health coaching, we teach all of the time that you can't just throw out old habits, you have to replace them with new ones.  If you practice the new habits long enough, the old habits die away and the new ones become prominent. Sometimes we focus so hard on NOT doing something but forget to create a new strategy.  So, what happens under stress when you don't have the mental strength to stop and think about something?  I submit that if you haven't been establishing new patterns, the old ones make a bold reappearance. 

Today in my study I thought about instead of just trying to NOT be an angry mom, what could I develop and be instead.  I asked myself, "What is the opposite of anger?"  The scriptures came to mind about children and that we must become like them: "submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love, willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him, even as a child doth submit to his father." (The Book of Mormon, Mosiah 3:19)  The word that sticks out to me is "meekness." 

The definition of meekness has always seemed to confuse me -- I had no idea what it meant, and so it fascinates me.   This morning, I read this scripture:  "Wherefore, if a man have faith he must needs have hope; for without faith there cannot be any hope.  And again, behold I say unto you that he cannot have faith and hope, save he shall be meek, and lowly of heart."  (The Book of Mormon, Moroni 7:42-43) 

I decided to dive deeper and searched for "meekness" on lds.org.  The very first result was the talk by Linda K Burton from the April 2011 General Conference titled "Become as a Little Child." She states,

What is it we should learn from children? What qualities do they possess and what examples do they demonstrate that can help us in our own spiritual development?

These precious children of God come to us with believing hearts. They are full of faith and receptive to feelings of the Spirit. They exemplify humility, obedience, and love. They are often the first to love and the first to forgive.

Have you ever noticed how quickly a little child hugs you after you scold them?  Do you ever notice how quickly they bounce back and play and smile?  Children want to be happy and loved.  Sometimes with our scolding and teaching of the "real world," it's as if we squash that enthusiasm to be happy beings.  Why do we let our negativity and weight of the world get in the way of the natural optimism that shine in kids?  Linda Burton says,  

These children are providing examples of some of the childlike qualities we need to develop or rediscover in ourselves in order to enter into the kingdom of heaven. They are bright spirits who are untarnished by the world—teachable and full of faith. It is no wonder the Savior has a special love and appreciation for little children.

So, what is the opposite of anger?  I would say "meekness."  The ability to remain calm, optimistic, bright, and soft-spoken in the midst of confusion, affliction, and suffering.  Meekness is a sense of quiet calm and strength.  It is not weakness, it is the highest form of strength, in my opinion.  A meek mother does not need or anger, force, or brutality to lead and nurture her children.  A meek mother is direct, focused, loving, and kind.  She doesn't mince words, but she isn't rude about it.  She sees life coming and says, "All right, here we go."  She smiles, plays with her kids, and loves life.  

 This is who I want to be instead of the angry, uptight, stressed-out-to-the-max, and negative momma.  Life should look a little more like this: